Love is my favorite word of all.

I love LOVE!

No matter how challenging my life has been, I have always leaned into the love and support of others. I believe that love is a universal truth and the most powerful tool in overcoming any type of obstacle. For me, love is the answer.

When I was a young teen, in Jr. High School, I had a poster on my wall, which read, “Love is the Answer”. I loved that poster so much and it was different shades of PINK! I now see that as the universe’s way of showing me back then, that the message of Love and the color Pink would be a huge part of my life down the road.

Although I grew up in foster homes and suffered abuse, I remember truly believing that love would save me. I believed in that poster. It gave me hope and held me up.

Learning to find love within and GIVE that love to myself was what made it possible for me to grow into a healthy person. I was able to find my true self, feel grounded, and in turn, share my love with others.

So if love is the answer, then what is the question? With summer beginning this week (and I LOVE summer), it’s the perfect time to take a moment, reflect and ask; “how much love do you give to yourself?”

This is the number one question and one that is hard for many of us to face. Although it sounds simple that we should love ourselves, many times it is the last thing we do. We put other people first or other things first and we don’t take our self-love into consideration. With a new season beginning, we can create an opportunity for ourselves, an opportunity to achieve a healthy body image through practicing self-love.

Here are three simple steps to begin to show yourself some love this summer:

1. Embrace the desire for continuous self- improvement – work on removing the layers of the proverbial onion so that you feel happier and freer about who you are.

2. Planning is Power. Know what you are getting yourself into before you go to a summer party. Practice responsibility with food and alcohol during the season by planning ahead.

3. Take complete and absolute responsibility for your circumstances and your outcomes. You are where you are today because of choices you have made in the past, and you now have the power to make choices that will serve you better. Start with one small step each month and by next summer, your life will be transformed.

We are all loving and although some of us may have a harder time accessing that love, we each have the power to give and receive it.

Remember, love is the answer.

I invite you to stop and reflect on what love means to you. How to you define it and what are some of the ways that you give love to yourself? Please comment here and join me at www.onepinky.com

RESOLUTIONS AND SOLUTIONS

“That which one has been desperately, furiously, relentlessly searching for has always been present, exactly where one is.” ~ Gangagi

Happy February! If you’re anything like me, you’re thinking – where did January go?! This is that time of year where those New Year’s resolutions, those promises to yourself to practice self-love through positive self-talk, healthy eating, and exercise may be slipping by the wayside.

And I’m here to say that’s okay! Don’t beat yourself up for getting sidetracked.

But, I’m also here to say – now’s the time to act. It’s not too late. Turn those resolutions into solutions.

The truth is that NOT making decisions is a form of fear. (And in its own way, it is a decision – it is a decision to be paralyzed and avoid risk.) Decisions are scary; it’s that simple. It means that something will change. From the big things, like new jobs and new loves, to the small things, like redecorating – decisions mean that something will change. If you’re on a journey to release excess weight, either for the first time or the hundredth, that decision needs to begin and be empowered by changing your mind. It is time to let go so you can have more self love and inner peace.

Tip #1 You are PERFECT. So how do we begin to fade indecisiveness and CHANGE OUR MINDS? We start with one simple and enormously powerful truth: You are wonderful, right now, exactly as you are. Yes, you may be on a journey to release excess weight (along with thousands of others), but RIGHT THIS MOMENT, you are perfect. How can that be true? How can I be perfect AND need to change? Well that, Virginia, is the miracle. We ALL need to change. It is the human condition. But we are all also perfect. The universe says so. Love says so. We only need to lay doubt and fear aside and see that simple truth to be empowered forward.

Tip #2 Choose and Rechoose. If you’re ready to choose and claim that perfect you and grab the power to move forward, you have to know that it’s a “choose and rechoose” decision. Life will get in your way. It’s that simple. You must be committed to choosing to lay indecision on the side every single morning (and maybe a hundred times a day). You must remove it like an old coat. You must be committed to that ONE action to begin changing your mind.

Use this meditation whenever you need to restart your commitment: Close your eyes and see yourself. You are standing in the room you are in. You are in a heavy old wool coat. It itches your skin. It smells old. It makes you sad. It seems to grow heavier by the moment – so heavy that you know you could not go very far in this coat. You see yourself from the outside and feel that coat around you from the inside. Now slowly, gently, take off the coat. Just lay it on the floor and step away from it. Stretch your arms wide and then toward the sky. Now stand up where you are, in real life, and stretch. You are freed from indecision EVERY time you do this exercise and do ONE thing to move forward (i.e., eat an apple, take a walk, call for support – remember, everything matters – every choice, every action).

Tip #3 Make a Decision to Give and Get Support – NO EXCUSES! Example A) Okay, not everyone can afford a personal body image mentor – but you MIGHT be able to afford a telecourse or a group seminar offered by such an expert. And you can offer something that may even surprise you! Example B) Maybe you can’t afford a gym – but you can probably afford a walking or hiking club (or START one!). Example C) Maybe you can’t find an hour a day to exercise – but you CAN steal three ten or fifteen minute breaks to do squats in the ladies’ room or walk really fast around your block three times. The point is that healing from the inside-out is definitely not one-size-fits-all, but there IS a perfect solution just for you – IF you will lay your fear and paralysis on the side and claim self care.

In America, right now, we have the highest level of overweight people in any place at any time in history. With all the abundance around us, we have made a decision (through indecision) to die. It’s that simple. To either drop dead from complications of obesity or choose to be trapped in the living death that food addiction and eating disorders cause. I do not share this with ANY judgment or arrogance. I have lived that way. And I have lived the way I live now. Believe me, this way is better. Spend a few minutes today and just love yourself. Know that you are perfect and have the ability to transform. So take a few seconds and weigh your options, knowing that help is here right now.

Take the body image checklist if you have not already on the home page, www.OnePinky.com

If not now, when?

I wish your lovable self a healthy, safe, fun, loving February!

I am happy to spend a few minutes answering your questions. Email me, Laura@OnePinky.com to set up a get to know you call.

This is my favorite month of the year. July is the half way mark. It is the month I reflect on my yearly goals and take a closer look at what is working and what is not.  I give birth to a new year of life every July and I use it to go deeper into my process and get clearer about what I want to create in the world.

I welcome you to relish in this month and this time of year.

Enjoy each moment.

Rejoice, renew, refresh, restart, rethink, revolve, reinvent, recommit to your process and your life.

I invite you all to take a few more moments to listen to my message below and know that you and your body are worthy of love.

Blessings and Love to you!

I have a sign that is in full vision to the right of my computer screen.  I bought it years ago in Hawaii.

It reads, “A Beginner’s Mind = Open Mind”

When I begin any of my work with students whether in a group or one on one, I ask them to act as if, they are beginner’s because our hearts and heads tend to be more open to new information without the weight of ” a know it all mentality”.

Even when we are learning practices we may have learned many times before, it is best to start with an open mind and open heart. Having a beginners mind does not discount what you already know, (it takes nothing away), it just adds to a deeper learning without arrogance and impatience.

Resistance

Resistance is the opposite of flow and flow = freedom.

When we resist, we are blocking self love and self care. Resistance also keeps away our ability to receive.

I know that anytime I show up for something minus gobs of resistance, I will always learn something new about myself. This is true for me no matter what I am doing. Anything from trying a new meal plan, to going to a workshop, to starting a yoga practice. I wish I could say that the resistance voice was gone for good. It is not. The gift is that I now have tools to be with it, honor it, accept it rather than deny it. I can be with the resistance and “do it anyway”!

• What about you? What does beginners mind mean to you?

• How do you think it would serve you to let go of resistance to learning something you may already know with an open mind?

• How do you think that would serve you more around your body?

Please take a few minutes to answer these questions on paper and notice what shows up.

I can tell you that resisting my work or any other work that will free you from negative body image is most likely not serving your being happy, joyous and free. And whenever we are in resistance to something chances are we need to go into that resistance, accept it  and find out what is really there. Perhaps it is something we do not want to feel. And what we do not feel, we cannot heal.

An Invitation

I invite you to step into your feelings a moment at a time. When I feel resistance to something coming on, I visualize myself taking one Pinky step. One small step, like the kitten is taking on the piano. And from that place, miracles show up all over the place. And I welcome miracles every day.

Aren’t you ready to be committed to your health and well being too?

]]> http://onepinky.com/abeginnersmindopenmind/feed/ 0 http://onepinky.com/acompanyvsamovement/ http://onepinky.com/acompanyvsamovement/#comments Fri, 26 Mar 2010 20:15:37 +0000 Laura Fenamore http://onepinky.com/?p=2180 Continue reading →]]> Just imagine that we live in a world where all women’s self worth was dependent on who she is, rather than her body?

I am holding that world in the palm of my hand and am 100% committed to get make this vision a reality.

I hope you will continue to join me on this ride to discover who you are….and be part of this Body Image Revolution.

It will be worth it.

I can remember, with almost perfect clarity, what if felt like to release weight week after week after week when I was 24 years old. I had been obese through my entire childhood and as a teenager. I don’t have to tell you the pain that went along with being “the fat kid” – a lot of you either shared that pain, or share a different one, as we watch our own kids become part of the obesity epidemic and grow heavier and heavier. I often wondered why I had success at weight loss and so many others did not.

Ten pounds – twenty pounds – a hundred pounds – chances are that MOST of you who read this have struggled with weight loss, and the low body image and self esteem issues that go with it, for years of your life.

Since my early twenties that I haven’t worked to keep that weight off.  My commitment to keeping my weight off is about self love and self care, not just about liking being thin. And to inspire others to discover their own bodies in a new way. That work became so important to me that I have become a well known speaker and mentor in the transformational movement, and built two very successful companies to empower others. I am also privileged to have inspired hundreds of people to create permanent change in their lives with a NEW philosophy.

I share all of this because I know ONE thing above all others: I know that hating our bodies can never heal them.

However, something still needs to shift. For every one person who loses ten pounds, ten more are gaining it (or gaining it back). As Americans, we have literally shifted the scales of our lives toward obesity, diabetes, heart disease, poor self-esteem, low body image, and on and on and on. We need to shift those scales back. And so, I am making a shift in my own life to be part of that effort – that movement of the scales.

Our bodies are amazing. Have you ever been given any other gift that runs 24/7, works tirelessly without being taught, and will always provide a home for you? Your body will never turn you away – even after you’ve beaten it up, called it horrible names, degraded it, and even hated it. It will just stay there, supporting you endlessly. What lover would do that?

Yet women seem to find their bodies so unlovable. Skinny, fat, hairy, short—we call ourselves such unkind names. Every waking hour of our lives, we criticize and express frustration, displeasure and even hate. Why? Because our bodies are truly that hideous? Or is it just that it’s so much easier to condemn the problems that we face each day than to take loving responsibility to create change? Loving our bodies – ourselves – doesn’t have to be so hard.

Loving your body can be as simple as loving a single finger on your hand. When I began my personal weight loss journey, I could find nothing about myself to love. A friend suggested that I start with just one pinky. “You have to start somewhere,” she said. Twenty-two years later, that loving place to start has stayed with me, and I have discovered the joys of loving my entire body.

In response to the enormous lack of love and personal sustainability in our world and our bodies, I am starting a new journey. A Body Image Revolution. And I invite all of you who read this to join me, and to invite your own friends, colleagues and relatives to join also.

If you don’t think you could love your body, I ask you one question:

Could you start today by loving just One Pinky?

We all have to start somewhere so start with your sweet little Pinky finger.

Sending you buckets of love and more love,XO

Laura

It makes my heart sing to have this soulful connection across the miles, actually across the equator!  I feel like she and her husband Leigh are family to me. We just know we will be meeting soon in person. And I think I can speak for both of us and say, we cannot wait for that day to come!

We will keep you posted on when that will take place.

I am so proud of your work Leah and your willingness to keep on keeping on no matter what presents itself.

You are an inspiration to this community and to the world.

And speaking of inspirations…

Gina who has kept her commitment to blogging daily, YOU GO GIRL!, recently wrote to tell me she is coming to California and will be stopping by my county. I am thrilled to say that she and I have a date to look forward to in April. More connecting with a Pinky. Love that.

I look forward to meeting many of you in time. It will happen.

And one more thing, before Leah and I got off the call, I read her something. This was a spiritual mind treatment I read to myself for many years. Actually, there were two, one called “Love” and the other called “Peace”.

I was happily surprised to find them in a drawer recently.

Leah loved hearing it and I loved reading it to her.

So here is the piece on “Peace” and stay tuned next week for the piece on “Love”.

Peace

The peace that sings throughout the cosmos wells up in me. I detect Its presence in my heart, my attitude and my body. I feel It, I believe It and I welcome It. With this Peace in me, nothing can move me from It. For wherever I go, there I find myself in the midst of Peace.

Peace to you Pinky’s!

I love you, XO

Laura

P.S. Please join us for a free teleclass this week with Steve Sisgold, on Wednesday, February 24th at 1pm PST.

Steve is an author, speaker and body-centered therapist who has taught thousands how to use their BQTM (innate body intelligence) to create better health, prosperity and more authentic relationships.

In his book, WHAT’S YOUR BODY TELLING YOU? (McGraw-Hill; July 2009) Steve teaches us how to breathe into our emotions, release stress from our bodies and maintain our physical and emotional health. This call will support you in having a body shift and I hope many if not all of you will be on the call.

This is a public call and please RSVP to info@onepinky.com and the call in information will be sent to you.

I got there we talked for a dew minutes and then she got me up on a massage table to move some energy up and out.

She asked me right up front to visualize a color to wipe away all pains and fears. My immediate reaction was PURPLE, since PURPLE has been the guiding force, “my favorite color” my whole adult life. I am known as the Purple Lady and I wear it alot.

While it is true that whatever color that came to me and I chose would have been perfect, I knew that the color would have a strong message.

This loud voice said NO to PURPLE and YES to PINK!

I said, “my color is pink”. She said, great, Pink represents SELF LOVE and that is what we want more of for you and the world.

I boldy agreed and I smiled inside and out with JOY.

PINK represents alot of things and SELF LOVE is only one of them. It was interesting to me that she immediately said “SELF LOVE, not knowing what I did in the world.

My intention is for you to all see the lights, your true colors…and to shine your them out in the world.

SELF LOVE is a great big bold first step to change anything. I love myself. I am ok.

I love how Leah is sharing her SELF LOVE at www.nodietingallowed.com by observing her distractions and noticing how things show up, and yet they do not stop her.

She is committed to excellence and SELF LOVE. Excellence can be such a loaded word and yet it is only a word. It is the meaning we attach to it that gives it weight or power.

Excellence is committment to being “who we are”. It is not perfectionism, a term that often gets associated with it.

So here, here to the color PINK and more so here, here to SELF LOVE.

Love,-Self-Love makes the world go round.

Think PINK, XO

Laura

2010 is going to be a powerful year.

I feel it, I sense it and I own it.

A gift to you all to create a practice before each meal in this New Year.

I think it is a delightful way to start 2010.

With a loving practice for your mealtime.

________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Recite before each meal.

This food is a gift from the entire universe.

The land, the sky, the ocean and the work of many people.

May I be the presence that deserves to receive this.

May I learn the right way of eating.

May I receive energy and be protected from illness.

May I walk the path of wisdom and love.

When I eat may I not forget the people who are now suffering from hunger in the world.

In this food, I see the presence of the entire universe supporting me.

-Mayumi Oda

And I offer you this from my heart for 2010.

May you be a guiding light for yourself and others who need protection and love.

May you be a ship to help others cross their ocean.

May you be a bridge for those who cannot find their way.

May you be the natural born  leader you are.

May you be love and live love and be the light you already are.

I Love You, XO

Laura

“May today be peace within. May you trust that you are exactly where you are meant to be… May you not forget the infinite possibilities that are born of faith. May you use those gifts that you have received, and pass on the love that has been given to you… May you be content knowing you are a child of God… Let this presence settle into your bones, and allow your soul the freedom to sing, dance, praise, and love. It is there for each and every one of you.”

I am away like you Leah, funny we are both away at the same time. :):)

I hope you and Leigh are having a great time. You deserve it.

I miss the Pinky’s, and I am looking forward to our call Monday night…

A simple practice for today….

Take a moment to stop, as you are right now,  to breathe deeply, to stand and hold your arms out from your body and to squat down and feel the ground under your feet. You ARE RIGHT NOW. You are not in your worries or your plans or the endless stream of thoughts in your head. You are in this moment. If you find yourself distracted by the chaos of others or your own endless, beautiful mind, you can do this simple exercise of stop, breathe, center and GROUND yourself to the moment you are in. Center your thoughts on the Earth. Ultimately, we ARE the ground. We are part of everything around us.

Be the grounded space you are.

Sending you Love and Peace, XO

Laura

Happy Birthday to You

Happy Birthday to You

Happy Birthday Dear Leah.

Happy Birthday to You.

From good friends and true,

From old friends and new,

May good luck go with you,

And happiness too.

The more you praise and celebrate your life, the more there is in life to celebrate.

-Oprah Winfrey

Thinking of you with love on your birthday and wishing you everything that brings you happiness today and always.

To the world, you may be one person. But to me, you are the world.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AelmBI0sJ3A

I love you Leah!

XOXOXO

Happy Birthday Woman, Let us know all about it.

Celebrating with you up here in California.

Laura